Naruto & Sugar Don't Mix
by TheShamanMaster
Summary: [Major OOC] Never mess with a blonde haired ninja when he's hyper. It can be dangerous and hazardous to your health! NaruSaku, with sided NaruTen [COMPLETED!]
1. Sugar Rush? Naruto's Hyper!

**TheShamanMaster presents...**

**Naruto & Sugar Don't Mix**

_Story & Script by TheShamanMaster_

_Naruto © Masashi Kishimoto_

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Naruto...people should know that by now XX...

**Note: **I'd like to dedicate this first chapter to the following people:

**kai's girl51** for her excellent story on _'Talking animals are a pain', _

**The Handsome Blue Beast **for his excellent story _'The Oddest Birthday'_ and finally,

**tsukiflower** for her _Sugar & Ed Don't Mix_ which has inspired me to right this Naruto-style one!

Also, this story is after the timeskip, so our good friend Sai is going to make an appearance.

**Chapter 1: **Sugar Blast? Naruto's Hyper!

Another day in Konoha, and Uzumaki Naruto was in his apartment. He was thinking of the best way to ask Sakura out to dinner, _without_ getting any distractions. He kept staring at the clock, and looked at the four walls around. 11:30am. He wanted it to do it today, before any new missions came up. He got up, and went to take a walk. It would probably clear his head and help think things through. Naruto walked down the street.

"Man, this got to be an easier way to get Sakura-chan to go out with me." He sighed. He walked passed Ichiraku's place, and noticed something on the counter. He ran over and picked it up. It was a short purple object with a note attached.

_Dear Naruto,_

_Sorry to disappoint you, but me and daddy are out today. Apparently, he's out of major ingredients and had to got outta town to get them. I decided to leave you this instead. Remember, not too much of this stuff 'kay?_

_Best Wishes,_

♥_Ayame._♥

Naruto sighed. "Crap, just when I want my favorite food, the place has to be closed! Crap!" He picked up the object. Turned out it was a bar of chocolate.

_Well...I guess it never hurts..._He took off the wrapper, and took a bite of chocolate. His tastebuds danced to the sweet flavour. He chewed it, and swallowed.

"Hey, this is pretty good!" Naruto scoffed the rest of the bar, and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He felt his hand shake, and a rush go through his body. He was feeling energized, and felt like someone had shocked him. Naruto grinned from ear to ear.

"SUGAR! I FEEL IT'S SURGE!" He yelled. Naruto ran down the street and headed for the candy store. He kicked the door in, and the man behind the counter dropped his newspaper, and hid himself.

"C-c-c-can I-i-i-i-i help you, s-s-sir?" The man said quivering. Naruto slammed his fists on the counter.

"Sugar! The best kind you got! No, make that, THE greatest you got!" He said grinding his teeth. The man pointed to a tray of caramel apples.

"M-m-m-m-may I suggest the c-c-c-caramel apples, s-sir?" Naruto's eyes widened. "CARAMEL!" He dove into his pocket for a handful of money, and dropped it.

"Here, keep the change!" He grabbed 2 caramel apples, a bag of gummy bears, 3 suckers, and a handful of marshmallows which he scoffed into his mouth. He rushed out the store faster then anyone had seen. The man sat there, scared as shit.

Meanwhile, Sai was sitting outside a Chinese Restuarant eating a box of noodles. (**A/N:** Don't ask me why, but I had some weird dream of Sai sitting down and eating noodles outside a restuarant.) He slurped some, when Naruto came rushing by.

"Hey, _Lai!_ How's it going?" He said with a few marshmellows still in his mouth.

Sai looked it up. "It's Sai, and what the hell happened to you?"

"Whatever, Pai! Hey, you wanna have a caramel apple? or maybe some gummy bears?" He pulled out the gummy bears.

"Dickless, What the hell did you eat? I don't want your candy! Can't you see I'm eating some noodles?" Sai looked disgusted

"Watch who your calling 'dickless', ass-wipe!" Naruto chucked the sticky apple right at Sai's head, and it slid down his forehead, and onto the table.

"I'll tear you limb from limb, you little jerk!" Sai went to grab Naruto, but he moved too quickly. And now Naruto was laughing his head off.

"See ya later, _Dai!_" He raced off into the distance.

Sai clenched his fist. "I'll get you! And it's Sai, asshole!" He took a deep breath. "That's it! Time to call in back up!" He pulled out a walkie-talkie, extended the aerial, and pressed a button.

"This is 'Lil' Chick' to 'Mother Hen'! Do you copy, 'Mother Hen'?"

"This is 'Mother Hen'. What's the situation there, 'Lil' Chick'?" Came a voice from the other end.

Sai responded. "We got ourselves a bit of a situation here, 'Mother Hen'. It's Uzumaki! He's run wild, it must be a sugar rush. He's heading north of the village."

"Copy that, 'Lil' Chick', we'll send a squad a.s.a.p! Over and out."

"Roger, over and out." Sai put the talkie away. _I gotta report this to the Hokage immediatly..._He thought. He headed towards Tsunade's Office.

Midway through the village, Naruto was still running fast. Most people were shocked at what was moving so fast. Naruto slowed down as he saw the Yamanaka Flower Shop ahead of him. He came to a halt.

"Flowers! What's a celebration of candy if you don't have flowers?" He popped a sucker in his mouth, and started to pick out a few white roses. He picked them off the bush they were growing on. Ino was inside when she heard some rustling outside.

"What the-?" She walked outside, and saw Naruto picking at her flowers. She clenched her fist.

"Naruto, you idiot! What do you think you're doing to my flowers?" She shouted. Naruto turned round, and saw Ino. Hearts appeared in his eyes. (**A/N:** Think of Sanji, but much bigger.)

"Ino-_chan_! How's my favorite person in the whole wide world?" Naruto pulled her close and gave a her a huge hug. (**A/N:** Awww!) Ino pushed him back.

"Naruto! What do you think you're doing? You just ruined that entire bush! Now, you're gonna have to pay for those! And now you-mmph!" Naruto then kissed her on the lips, and gave her another huge hug.

"I'm sorry, Ino-chan! Here, you wanna sucker?" He pulled out another lollipop still in its wrapper, and gave it to Ino. This just made her more mad. A dark aura appeared around her.

"NARUTO! I'm gonna kill you!" She cracked her knuckles. Naruto quickly dove into his pocket and pulled out a roll of money. (**A/N:** Yes, he does have a lot of money! From all those missions!) He chucked it at her.

"There's ya money! Now don't hurt me please!" He put on puppy dog eyes. As Ino reached down to the ground to pick up the money, Naruto grabbed her hand, spun her around, and sweeped her off her feet.

"Shall we dance, m'lady?" He asked slyly as he spun her around, and kissed her again. Ino then punched Naruto in the nuts. He collasped in pain.

"Mummy...mummy...stop the pain please...where's my gummy bears, mummy?" He said almost at tears. He reached for the last marshmallow in his pocket, and quickly ate it.

Ino was now very pissed off. "Naruto, if this is some kind of a joke, it ain't funny! Where do you get off kissing me like that?" Naruto grinned. He stood up and started to run off.

"Catch me if you can, my precious boar! Remember, do not deny our love! I shall return, with a crown!" He ran off so fast, Ino couldn't see him.

_Damn, Naruto you bastard! You're so gonna die later! I better tell Sakura about this..._Ino ran back inside, and picked up the phone to dial Sakura's number. As she waited for Sakura to pick up, she shuffled the money that Naruto dropped.

_Hmm...more then I thought. _She smiled evilly. _Maybe I can get something after all..._

"Hello, Sakura speaking." Sakura answered

"Sakura? Thank god! You won't believe want happened-"

"You're finally dating Shikamaru?"

"No! It's Naruto! Well, you see..." Ino began replaying the whole incident. By now, Naruto was past halfway through the village. He went looking around for more stuff. He then spotted a cola machine. He didn't have any small change, so he punched and kicked it a few times. KA-CHUNK! A can of cola came out the bottem. He grabbed it, and opened it.

"A toast! To sugar, and all it's great holiness!" He drank some and felt re-charged. People were looking at him and giving him weird looks. Rock Lee walked by and saw the smashed machine.

"Naruto-kun! What has happened here?" Lee rushed over (to what looked like) his (fallen) comrade.

"Lee! My good friend! Let's celebrate this youthful day together like cousins! No, not cousins! Make it brothers!" Naruto grabbed Lee, and slung his arm around his neck.

"So how about it, my good friend, Lee?" Lee's jaw dropped and was now gobsmacked. He clenched his fist.

"Naruto-kun...I shall! The power of youth has exploded in you after all! I knew this day would come! We must celebrate this moment! Let's eat, what ever you have, it's on me!" He said striking the ''nice guy'' pose and shining his teeth.

"Yes! We'll celebrate with junk food! I want candy floss! No, make it taffy! No! Both together!" Naruto smiled so wide he teeth shone bright then Lee's.

Lee smiled also. "Yes let's go!"

At Tsunade's Office, Sai had arrived there. "Tsunade-sama, there's something I must report to you."

Tsunade looked up from her desk. "Sai-san? What is it?"

"It's Naruto-san! Something's up and we must stop him!"

**To Be Continued... **

**

* * *

**Okay, people, please do review. This story is gonna be 5 Chapters long, since I have to get back to my other fics. But please please do review for now. 

If some of you are unsure, "Ino" means 'boar'. So Naruto made a pun when he said my 'precious boar'. Oh, and there will be a pairing at the end of this fic!


	2. Cunning Plan! Spiegel & Black?

**TheShamanMaster presents...**

**Naruto & Sugar Don't Mix**

_Story & Script by TheShamanMaster_

_Naruto © Masashi Kishimoto_

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Naruto...people should know that by now XX...

**Note: **This Chapter is dedicated to:

**Shuyoru Kayume **for reviewing my Bleach Fic, and adding me on DeviantART as a buddy!

**Hououza **for reviewing my fics also!

and finally **Mizu Hime** for reviewing "Naruto's Beach Party!"

-I've been watching Cowboy Bebop The Movie (great) so that's inspiration for this chapter! Oh, and Cowboy Bebop belongs to the number one director, **Shinchiro Watanabe!**

**-**Oh, and the lyrics in this chapter belong to Yoko Kanno of Seatbelts!

**

* * *

Chapter 2: Cunning Plan! Spiegel and Black?**

Tsunade sat with her hands together. "I see. So what you're telling me, is that Naruto's gone hyper from sugar?"

Sai looked embrassed. "Yes. It seems that way."

Shizune looked worried. "Tsunade-sama, what should we do?"

"We'll call an ANBU squad to track him, and catch him. It's the only thing we can do." Tsunade said with a heavy sign. "Sai, you better go. Keep a track on Naruto." Sai nodded and left the room.

"Why do you think Naruto's acting like this? You think something happened to him?" Shizune said

"It's probably just a childhood-phase Naruto's re-experiencing. He'll probably get over it soon, hm?" Tsunade had that feeling someone was watching her. She looked out her window, and saw Jiraiya standing on the roof above her.

"Jiraiya, what the hell do you think your doing? Eavesdropping like that?"

Jiraiya cracked a smile. "Well, I couldn't help overhearing Naruto's little 'problem'. But I have to say, this _has _happened before. So I better tell you."

"Jiraiya, get your ass inside now!" Tsunade declared. Jiraiya quickly jumped inside. He cleared his throat.

"Well, this happened to Naruto in the 2.5 years we were away. He got hyped up, and that time, it took me around 7 hours before he calmed down. Apparently, it happened when he went to get some onigiri, and some idiot put sugar on them instead of salt."

Tsunade's eyes widened. "You don't say! But why does he seem so...happy?"

"I think it's because he was so miserable in his childhood, he wants to forget about it, and be happy again." Jiraiya sighed. "Well, I hope we can catch him, before he does something he'll regret..."

"Like what?"

"Trust me, you don't wanna know. But I might know a trick or two to stop him..."

"Like?" Tsunade asked

"Well..." Jiraiya continued on speaking. On the other side of town, Naruto and Lee were rushing down the street.

"Naruto-kun! What will you have first?" Lee asked.

Naruto looked around, and spotted a candy floss stand. "Candy Floss! Dead ahead!" Both came to a halt, and appeared before the stand.

The man on the stand smiled. "Your just in time, I was whipping up a fresh batch." He handed a big stick of floss to both ninja. Lee dove in his pocket, and handed the man some money.

"Keep the change." Lee muttered as he and Naruto took large bites out the sticky, fluffy, pink candy. Naruto quickly looked round, and spotted something else that caught his eye.

"Lee-san! I spot something else exciting!" He pointed to a costume store.

"Yes! Costumes! Brilliant idea, Naruto-kun! We shall look positivly awesome!" Lee and Naruto finished their candy floss, and rushed inside the store.

* * *

Meanwhile, Ino was still getting over her 'dramatic' moment.

"I swear, I'm gonna kill that idiot! He wasn't himself at all. And why did he kiss me anyway?" She touched her lips. They still had a scent of sugar on them.

_Well I suppose it was kinda nice of him..wait! What the hell am I thinking? I don't even have feelings for him. We're friends and thats it! Maybe I could try being a bit nicer to him I suppose..._She sighed. She went into the back, and got herself some water.

Sakura had rushed into Tsunade's office. _The nerve of him! Kissing Ino like that! Now I'm pissed off..._

_**Inner Sakura: Just you wait Naruto! You'll be the one kissing me soon! I'll make sure of it!**_

"Tsunade-sama! Naruto's gone..." Sakura saw that Tsunade looked pissed off.

"JIRAIYA! IF YOU THINK "THAT'S" GONNA HAPPEN, YOUR SADLY MISTAKEN!" Tsunade boomed and clenched his fist.

"B-b-b-b-but Tsunade, all I need is a girl whose willing to dress in a bikini, and seduce Naruto and-YEOUCH!" He got punched in the nose.

The Hokage scoffed. "You pervert! Your just gonna do it so you can write your damn novels!"

Sakura swallowed hard. "Tsunade-sama, what's going on?"

"Jiraiya says that to stop Naruto, we have to give him a hard hit on the head, or make him get seduced by a girl in a bikini!"

"Well, I gave him a copy of Icha Icha Paradise last time, and after he got a nosebleed, he stopped. But we can't run around with a book! He's too fast. We'll have to get someone to seduce him and..." He turned to Sakura. He got down on his knees and begged.

"Please, Sakura-_hime_! Help me, the great Sannin, Jiraiya! If you do, I will give you anything you want! Money, clothes, food! Anything your heart desires!" Jiraiya was almost crying.

"No! Why can't I just hit him?" Sakura said crossing her arms.

"We don't want him dead! Last time you hit him, you almost broke every bone in his face! Please, I beg of you, Sakura-hime!" Jiraiya was now on the ground, kissing her feet.

"Alright, alright, alright! I'll do it! But you gotta stop this crap." Sakura kicked him in the face. "And don't look at my rack from that angle! Pervert!"

Jiraiya raised his hand. "Y...Y...Yes...Sakura-chan..." He blacked out for a minute, and woke up. He got to his feet, and sighed.

"Alright, here's what we're gonna do. Sakura, you..." And so, the plan was discussed.

* * *

Back in the costume store, Naruto and Lee were trying on different costumes, and found ones that they liked. Also, a boombox, which was brand new.

"Okay, so we have what we want! But which girl can we give this costume?" Lee asked holding up quite a revealing outfit.

"Which girl has the biggest boobs?" Naruto replied

"Does the Hokage shit in the woods?" Lee said sarcasticly

"No clue, amigo! Maybe Sakura-chan!" Naruto said popping another sucker in his mouth.

"Maybe youthful TenTen! According to my eternal rival Neji, she is the sexiest looking girl in Konoha! How youthful young women can be!" The taijutsu user said with fire in his eyes.

"But Sakura-chan! She's sooooooo cute!" The blonde replied sadly.

Lee pondered for a moment. "Hmm. My dear comrade, you say quite a wonderful thing! Indeed, Sakura-chan is very cute! But I believe TenTen is much cuter!"

"Rock, Paper, Scissors to decide?" Naruto asked getting his hand ready.

"Nah, I say we just get the first one that comes our way! Let's pay for this stuff." Lee and Naruto payed for the clothing and the boombox, and left the store wearing the outfits.

"How do we look?" The blonde whispered

"Like the coolest dudes around." Lee whispered back. Naruto switched on the boombox, popped a CD in from his back pocket, and started to dance.

* * *

Team 8 were getting some icecream. Kiba had Mint Chocolate Chip, Shino had Vanilla, and Hinata had Strawberry.

"This was q-quite nice of you, Kiba-kun." Hinata said having a few licks.

"Yes, thank you." Shino said starting his.

"Heh, what can I say, I'm a nice guy...hm? Hey, do you hear music?" Kiba said

Hinata and Shino stood still for a moment. "Seems that way." Shino replied.

"It's getting louder. Who do you think it could be?" Hinata asked worridly.

"ARF ARF!" Akamaru barked.

"Hey, Akamaru, what do you...huh? Is that...Naruto?" Kiba said wide-eyed.

Team 8 saw Naruto and Lee dancing down the street in some odd looking outfits. Naruto was wearing a dark suit, with a yellow shirt underneath, and a black tie. He also had a wig of mopped hair. Lee, however, was wearing a light colored outfit, with some metal boots, and a fake prosthetic arm. He also had a bald head cap, with some facial hair. They began to moonwalk to a very familar tune.

**You and I are betting on words **

**You and I are wandering worlds apart from each other joined at the heart.**

**You and I escaping the Earth Tasting tears for all that it's worth apart from each other joined by a thought **

**Can you believe me? Still sitting pretty with a pistol in hand **

**Living to love you will you be my man? If I beg, If I plead **

**Would you please, please, please satisfy me? **

A hoard of fangirls were screaming with hearts in their eyes. "Naruto-kun! You are soooo hot!"

"We love you, Naruto-kun!"

"Your the greatest!"

Team 8 just stared with their jaws hanging out.

"What in the hell?" Kiba asked. "Oi, Naruto! OI!" Naruto heard his name being called, and switched off the music. He and Lee walked over.

"Naruto, what are you wearing?" Shino asked eyeing him.

"N-Naruto-kun, are you f-f-f-feeling well?" Hinata stammered.

Naruto smiled. "Please, I am Spike Spiegel!"

"And I am Jet Black of the infamous 'Bebop' crew! And it seems we found our "Faye Valentine!" Lee continued.

Kiba and Hinata looked at each other. "F-F-Faye Valentine? Who is she?" Hinata asked.

"You of course! You've got the beauty, the brains, and the curves of Faye! Come, Hinata-chan! Join us, on this day of youthfulness and sunshine!" Naruto shouted.

The Hyuuga Heiress stood their turning red. "Y-Y-You l-like m-me, N-Naruto-kun?" She asked turning red even more.

"Woah woah! Back off, Naruto! Just what is going on?" Kiba said stepping out in front. The blonde pulled out a pistol.

"Back off or I feel you full of lead. You can be one of the bad guys." He said holding the gun to Kiba's head. He put it away. He crawled Hinata and put on puppy dog eyes.

"Pretty, pretty pretty please, Hinata-chan! It'll be fun! Pwease!" Naruto held her hand, which made her red as blood.

"O-O-Okay, Naruto-kun! I suppose it will be fun." Naruto gave her the outfit, and she went inside a nearby toilet to change clothes. Kiba wanted to have a look, but Shino stopped him saying that she would never forgive him. After 5 minutes, Hinata came out, looking very, very hot. Kiba got a huge nosebleed, and fainted.

"Faye! You're here at last! The 'Bebop' crew is finished at last-" Lee cried

"Not exactly. We still gotta get an Ed." Naruto cut him off

"Why not ask Konohamaru?" Shino suggested. The others looked at him, and he just shrugged.

"Konohamaru it is! Let's go!" Hinata said happily. Naruto switched the boombox on again, and the 3 of them started to dance down the street. Shino stood there eating his ice cream. _Hmmm...I'll suggest them for Konoha's next theater production..._

Sai then jumped in. "Shino-san, have you seen Naruto?"

"You just missed him. He was here like 5 minutes ago. He went that way." Shino pointed.

Sai nodded. "Thanks, cya later." Sai disappeared. The bug ninja sighed.

_Well, if he's Spike Spiegel, then I'm a gangster. _He adjusted his hood, then pulled out his phone, and cranked up the sound.

"Now dis is good shit! Peace out to ma brethren in Konoha!" He said smiling as he bobbed his head to **Ain't Nuttin' But A G Thang** by **Snoop Dogg & Dr. Dre**

* * *

Sakura, however, went back home to change. She had decided to take part in the plan after all. She changed into a pink bikini, and covered herself up with a large, white overcoat.

"This has better work! Or you are so dead Naruto!" She said as she zipped up the overcoat and put on some sunglasses. Sakura left her house.

At a nearby cafe, sitting outside, Gai, Neji, and TenTen were enjoying some soup.

"What soup did you order anyway? This is damn good." Neji commented

"Asparagus! One of the Konoha's finest flavours!" Gai said giving a thumbs up. TenTen just sighed. She then heard music.

"Hey, Neji, sensei, do you hear music?" The males listened.

"Must be nothing. But if it's something, I bet Lee's involved." Neji muttered

Gai gave a heavy sigh. "Neji, why must you jump to conclusions? That is not the youthful thing to do!"

As TenTen had another spoonful, she saw what looked like Lee, Naruto and Hinata. She raised her eyebrow.

"Hey, is that, Lee? and Naruto? with Hinata?" Neji looked up.

"Oh my lord! What is my cousin wearing?"

"I dunno, But Naruto looks pretty hot." TenTen said as her cheeks got a small blush on them.

Gai was surprised as anyone! "Lee! My beloved student! How goes you this fine day?"

The Hyuuga was surprised and felt a nosebleed coming. When did his cousin get so...hot?

The so-called ''Bebop'' crew walked over to Gai and the others. "Yo, Gai, Neji, TenTen! What's up?" Naruto asked

All 3 recieved blank stares, and then Gai spoke. "Naruto! You look perfect in that suit!"

"Gai-sensei! He's youthful now like me! And please, call him Spike Spiegel, me Jet Black, and Hinata, Faye!" Lee exclaimed as he gave his sensei a bear hug.

Naruto looked at TenTen. "Yo, babe, what's happening?" He winked at her, which made her blush. "Hey...Spike..." She said confused.

Neji was gobsmacked. "Hey, Hina-..I mean, Faye...how are you?"

"I'm am well, Neji-neesan." Hinata replied softly.

Gai had tears in his eyes. "This so wonderful! The more youthfulness, the better! I shall dress up also! I will be, Napoleon! Or maybe, Chuck Norris!" Neji elbowed him, and Gai sat back down.

The spandex-wearing sensei sighed. Watching them from afar, Sai had found Naruto. _Now I just gotta wait..._

**To Be Continued... **

**

* * *

Chapter 2 is done! Will Sai take out Naruto? Find out in Chapter 3:** Naruto Charges! Sai Chases! 

-The comment that Lee made 'Does The Hokage Shit in the woods?' comes from GTA: San Andreas.


	3. Naruto Charges! Sai Chases!

**TheShamanMaster presents...**

**Naruto & Sugar Don't Mix**

_Story & Script by TheShamanMaster_

_Naruto © Masashi Kishimoto_

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Naruto...people should know that by now...

**Note: **Thank you for the reviews! I'm glad you're liking this story! I'm dedicating this chapter to all those people who have me on their "Favorite Authors" list!

**Chapter 3: **Naruto Charges! Sai Chases!

Naruto, Hinata, and Lee sat down with Team Gai. Neji couldn't stop looking at Hinata. She was so damn sexy.

"Naruto, are you feeling well?" Neji said to take his thoughts off Hinata.

The blonde took the sucker out his mouth and chucked it away. "I told you, call me Spike. And I'm fine, just in a good mood thats all. Oh, that reminds me..." He still had the flowers from earlier on, but wrapped up. He took one out, and gave it to TenTen.

"A flower for a pretty girl?" He said with hearts in his eyes. TenTen blushed even more and took the flower.

"Aww, Thank you so much, Spike-kun!" She pulled him in and gave him a kiss. Neji was feeling green with envy. _Bastard! I should be kissing her not him! That does it! _

Naruto turned to Hinata. "And one for you too." He took another one, and placed it in Hinata's hair. "Now you look cute also." Hinata blushed also.

"Thank you!" She gave Naruto a hug. Neji grinded his teeth. Now, he was pissed off. _Screw you! I should be getting the chicks around here..._ He flipped the table over, and what was left of Gai's soup fell on Naruto's head.

"Alright, "Spike", if you think you're really tough, then let's fight! I'll kick your ass! I'll teach you that I'M the ONLY one that kisses TenTen!" Neji smirked

Gai looked worried. "Neji, I must go against this! How dare you-ooof!" Neji punched Gai the stomach.

"You shut up, "Gay-sensei!" TenTen got crossed. "Neji, what the fuck is wrong with you? Naruto's in a good mood, and you get annoyed? What's your problem?"

"Keep outta this, bitch!" Neji barked. TenTen felt her eyes watering. "Neji...you ignorant bastard!"

Naruto was dripping with soup. He licked some of it. "Asparagus...yuck..." He took a fighting stance. "That's it! I'm gonna kick your ass for sure! You don't insult a woman while I'm around! Jet, Faye, I'll handle this." Lee nodded and stepped back.

Neji grinned. "This I gotta see." He took his stance and got ready to fight.

Sai was watching from the rooftop. "Great, he just has to start this now. I better do something. I don't want this to get ugly." He pulled out a scroll and his paintbrush. He began drawing some animals on the scroll. He drew around several liosn, and put his paintbrush down.

_I won't use the jutsu yet...only when it needs it...This is gonna be good..._Sai sat down, and got out some popcorn.

Neji activated his Byakugan. He charged forward ready to strike, and Naruto jumped up and back flipped to kick Neji in the back. But Neji grabbed his foot, and the blonde punched forward, which also got caught. Naruto then spun round, and kicked Neji in the stomach, which knocked back.

Naruto landed on his feet, smirking. "Sorry, jackass, you're gonna gave to do better then that."

The Hyuuga grew angry. "Who you calling jackass, scumbug?"

Lee then looked surprised. "OOOHH! This calls for some action music!" He pressed the button on the player, and it started to play ''The Mortal Kombat Theme''.

Both of the fighters looked at Lee, then looked at each other. Naruto chucked a kunai forward, which Neji caught. He was distracted, that Naruto was trying to tackle him, but Neji stopped him. "Jyuuken!" He strike Naruto on the chest. "Two Strikes! Four Strikes! Eight Strikes! Sixteen Strikes! Th-What the hell?" He was stopped by Hinata who had Jyuukened him in the back.

"You bitch!" He swung round and struck Hinata in the abdomen. Naruto then kicked him in the head, which threw him off balance, and he fell down. Naruto breathed heavily, and was about to fall down. Neji stood up.

"That's it! No more games!" He snarled. He rushed forward to strike Naruto again. Sai watched in awe. _No...he's gonna kill Naruto...not if I can help it! _

"I don't think so!" Sai shouted. Naruto and the others looked up to see Sai who was performing some handseals.

"Ninpou: Chojuu Giga!" Then loads of ink lions appeared from the scroll, and went to attack Neji. He was now fighting off loads of ink lions.

"Naruto! Get out of here now! I'll deal with you later!" Naruto looked up. _He's saving me?_

"What are you waiting for? Get the hell outta here!" Sai said seriously. Naruto nodded.

"Lee, Hinata, TenTen, Gai-sensei!" The others nodded. They started to race off across the village. Sai jumped down and casted a few more lions. _Damn...I can't keep this up for long! _

Neji was seriously pissed. "Dammit!" He continued fighting off the ink lions, until no more dispersed. "Some fight, you're weak after all and-" He looked around, and Sai had disappeared. "Damn you, Naruto! and Sai!" He started to race off in the same direction as the others.

* * *

Meanwhile, Naruto, Lee, Hinata, Gai, and TenTen were far ahead. "Y'think we lost 'im?" Gai asked.

"I hope so." Naruto began chewing on some gummy bears, and he felt enegized again. "I think we better split up, so we'll be easier to get away." Naruto said as they were approaching a crossroads.

"But what about Konohamaru?" Lee asked

"He'll have to wait. On three, we split! One...Two...Three!" Naruto shouted. He went straight, Lee turned left and Hinata, turned right.

On a balcony, Shikamaru was up to his favorite hobby: Cloud gazing.

"Man, this is nice. Nothing to do, but relax." He closed his eyes and began to snooze when he was interrupted by someone below. He lazily opened one eye.

"Is that..Naruto? Why is he dressed like an anime character? This is troublesome..." Naruto spotted Shikamaru and jumped up to join him.

"Hey Shika, Shaker, Maker, Saker, Laker! How's it going?" He said grinning

The lazy genius was surprised. "Naruto? Are you feeling well? Why are you dressed like that?"

"Just wanting to try on a different style that's all." He started to poke Shikamaru in the shoulder. (**A/N: **Think of how Luffy likes to annoy people.)

Poke.

Poke.

Poke.

Poke.

Shikamaru gritted his teeth. "Cut that out, you idiot! You're on something right?"

"Why'd you say that, Shika Shaker Maker?" He said laughing

Shikamaru spotted the gummy bears in his pocket. _I knew it! Sugar! I'll play along with him..._

The lazy genius smiled. "Hey, Naruto. We're pals right? Why don't we sit down, and I'll get us something to drink. You want some Cola?"

"The best you got!" Naruto lyed down on the bench.

"Okay, I'll get us some!" Shikamaru walked off. "I have to keep him busy for now." He said to himself. As he walked off, TenTen came up the stairs and found Naruto about to snooze.

"Naruto-kun! There you are! I thought I lost you." She said with a smile.

The blonde looked over his shoulder. "TenTen-_chan_! My other favorite person in the world!" He raced over, and gave the brunette a huge hug. He noticed that she had put the flower in her hair also. TenTen was blushing crazy-like.

"Naruto-kun, thanks, for standing up for me. I mean, I didn't know Neji could be so cruel!" She said crossing her arms.

"There's a lot of ignorant bastards in the world. That's just how the world works today." He sighed. TenTen sat down with him on the bench, and snuggled a little closer to him.

"You're pretty handsome, you know? Let's make out right here, right now?" TenTen said tracing her fingers on his whiskers. (**A/N: **Just to let you know, when he bought the outfit, he didn't buy any make up. So his whisker marks are still visable.)

"You mean right here? But what if someone finds out or sees us?" The blonde exclaimed.

"No one else has to know." She leaned and kissed him on the lips. His lips had a scent of sugar, which left her begging for more. Both of them kissed again, but this time more passionatly. TenTen lyed down, and Naruto was on top of her. They wrapped their arms around each other, and kissed harder. TenTen brushed her tongue against Naruto's lips, wanting an entrance. Naruto let her. TenTen was tasting sweet, sweet nectar in his mouth. She didn't want to stop. That's until a certain ninja came back up the stairs...

"Hey, Naruto! I got you some...GREAT SCOTT!" He saw both of them kissing. Both of them stopped and looked up. Shikamaru turned the other way and began to run. Naruto quickly pulled out a kunai and threw it. It struck Shikamaru's ankle, which made him trip over the rail, and fall into a pile of watermelons!

"Now, where were we?" TenTen said slyly. She and Naruto kissed again.

* * *

Meanwhile in the watermelons box below, Shikamaru was covered in watermelon juice. "Son of a bitch! That was some juicy gossip. Heh, I made a joke. Watermelons. Juicy. Hehehe, What the hell am I doing?" He got up, and figured to go home to have a bath. Suddenly, a man came out from the house next door.

"You fool! You ruined my precious melons! My beautiful fruit!" He clenched his fist. "You're gonna pay for this you jerk!"

Shikamaru scoffed. "Yeah, you and what army?" The man snapped his fingers, and in the street, a whole bunch of shinobi appeared with kunai's out.

"I object to that your honor. I'll be going now, cya!" Shikamaru turned tail and began running off.

"Charge! Catch that scumbug!" Shikamaru moved fast across town, with loads of ninja behind him.

* * *

On the west side, Hinata had gotten away and apparently was close to her house. Hanabi was sitting on the balcony reading a magazine, and spotted her sister wearing a really weird outfit. She dropped the magazine and shouted out:

"Hey, onee-chan! What are you wearing?"

Hinata turned red. "Er...gift from Team Gai?"

Hanabi sighed. "Yeah, well Eyebrows-san has some weird taste in clothes! Get your butt in here before dad sees you." Hinata sighed, and walked inside.

* * *

Lee, however, ended up at a curry shop, and was enjoying several bowls of curry. He was on his 8th now.

"Geez, you must've been hungry. That'll be 750 ryou for all that, sir."

Lee looked up, and threw another rolled up batch of money on the counter. The man was gobsmacked. "Where'd you get this money?"

"Missions," Lee finished his last bowl. "Thanks for the food. Cya later!" He left the shop, wondering what to do next. _Where did Naruto-kun end up? We were having so much fun...Is that Sakura-san?_

"Hey, Sakura-san! How are you this fine day?" He asked politely as Sakura approached him

"I'm fine, Lee-san. Have you seen Naruto-kun anyway? He's on sugar and I need to track him down..." Sakura said softly

"Sugar? SUGAR? HE WAS ON SUGAR? No wonder that explained his youthful behaviour! Sakura-san, I must tell you an exciting tale of the ''Bebop Crew in Konoha''! By the way, what's with the overcoat?" He said looking at her.

Sakura sighed. "If I show, will you promise not to tell anyone?"

"By my spandex suit I swear!" Lee said with fire in his eyes.

The pink-haired girl sighed again. She unzipped the overcoat, and revealed what she was wearing underneath.

Lee's eyes widened. "I have never seen such beauty in Konoha! You are so beautiful, Sakura-san!" Oddly enough, he didn't get a nosebleed. _That's weird...no nosebleed..._He thought. _Am I not attracted to this beautiful kunoichi in anyway?_

Sakura blushed, and zipped up the overcoat. "Okay, you promise not to say anything? And can you help me find Naruto?"

Lee did a salute. "Yes! I swear, we shall look for Konoha's number one, hyperactive, knucklehead ninja! Let us go!" He and Sakura then walked off to find Naruto.

Sai, however, had managed to catch up to Naruto. "B-I-N-G-O." He said as he spotted Naruto, with TenTen asleep in his lap.

**To Be Continued...

* * *

**

Chapter 3 done! I hope you enjoyed! Please review! 


	4. What Happend? Get Back The Bebop Crew!

**TheShamanMaster presents...**

**Naruto & Sugar Don't Mix**

_Story & Script by TheShamanMaster_

_Naruto © Masashi Kishimoto_

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Naruto...people should know that by now...

**Note: **Thank you everyone for the reviews! Glad you enjoy this! Here's Chapter 4. This is dedicated to everyone on MY favorite Authors list.

"talking"

_"Thinking/Flashback"_

**"Kyuubi Talking"**

**

* * *

Chapter 4: What Happened? Get Back The Bebop Crew!**

"So lemme, get this right? You, Naruto AND Hinata dressed like the crew from Cowboy Bebop, Naruto gave TenTen a flower, Neji got jealous, tried to beat the shit out of him, and you got seperated?" Sakura asked after Lee had told her the story.

"Yes! It was quite an adventure! Hinata looked so amazing in that 'Faye Valentine' outfit! The power of youth explodes!" Lee said with fire in his eyes (again).

"You can say that again, Jet Black!" Came a familiar voice. Sakura and Lee looked round, and in a puff of smoke, Gai appeared.

"Gai-sensei? What are you wearing?" Lee asked. Gai was wearing a wide-brimmed hat, with a colored robe over him, and odd-shaped boots. He was dressed like Clint Eastwood.

"Please, I am The Man With No Name! If that's too much to remember, call me, The Man for short!" He drew a revolver, and started to spin the barrel to reload it.

"Er...Gai-sensei..not to spoil the moment, but we're kinda looking for Naruto. So if you wanna save the antics for now, and help us look for him, that will be very nice." Sakura said trying not to get angry.

Gai smiled. "I'm way ahead of you!" He whistled, and a horse came galloping around the corner, and stopped in front of the group.

"Allow me to introduce my noble steed!" He started to get teary-eyed. "I call him...Lee HyuTen Jr...yes...he's a...handsome devil..." Sakura and Lee looked at the horse. Gai was right!

"Now! Let's hop on! We'll find Naruto quickly." The big eye-browed sensei hopped on first, then his copycat student, then the pink-haired beauty. "Hang on tight! We'll be going fast! Now, Lee Jr., away!" He shook the reins, and the proud horse started to gallop.

"Gai-sensei, how long have you had a horse anyway?" Sakura said curiously. Gai took a deep breath.

"Well, it all started 2 months ago when I won the Konoha Sweepstakes..."

_Flashback to 2 months ago._

_"...and the winner of the Konoha Sweepstakes prize is...Maito Gai!" The announcer declared on the TV._

_"YAHOOOOOOOO! My hard work has paid off!" Gai did a pose, and made his teeth shine._

_"Work? What work? All you did was enter a ticket." Kakashi said with his nose in his book._

_"Is that jealousy I'm hearing from my eternal rival, Kakashi?" Gai sniggered_

_"Forget it." Kakashi mumbled._

_Gai had won a cheque for 250,000 Ryou. He picked up the cheque the next day, and cashed it. He then called his team over to the meeting place._

_"My beloved students! Since I am now very rich, I'm giving you 10,000 Ryou each out of my winnings." He presented each of his students with a stack of money._

_Neji was lost for words. "Now...I can buy more weapons for myself..."_

_TenTen was smiling. "I can get myself some more clothes. Silk...Leather...the finest in the village!"_

_"At last! All the curry I can eat, and I can get a kitten!" Lee smiled happily. _(**A/N: **Now you know why Lee had all that money to pay for the food, the outfits and the curry.)

_"A kitten? Since when have you wanted a kitten?" Neji asked_

_"Ever since I was 8 years old! Kittens are so cute and soft, and I'm gonna own one! Thank you, Gai-sensei!" Lee was in tears_

_Gai gave another pose. "Anything for my beloved students!" _

_A few days later, Gai went down to the Konoha stables, and bought himself a horse._

_"A horse? You spent half your cash on a HORSE?" Asuma said almost swallowing his smoke._

_"Of course! I've wanted a stallion for a long time! In fact, my father owned a horse! But sadly, it died. He called him...Joey!" Gai said looking at a photo in his wallet._

_Kakashi let out a heavy sigh. "I suppose it's true what they say. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em."_

_A week later, Lee had bought a little kitten. It was a small ginger tom, and he had called him, Yama. TenTen thought it was so cute, but Neji thought it was a bad idea. He thought Lee wasn't responsible enough, but he proved him wrong._

_End Flashback_

"Wow...surprising...Lee, can I borrew some cash? Theres this gorgeous diamond necklace I've been wanting for weeks, but I'm still 2,000 Ryou short...Please?" Sakura asked.

Lee smiled. "Of course you can, Sakura-san! As soon as we catch Naruto-kun! Gai-sensei! Go faster, we don't have much time. Naruto-kun could be in real danger!" He was still thinking of Sai, and what he said by 'I'll deal with you later'.

The sensei nodded, and shook the reins harder, and the horse picked up speed.

* * *

Meanwhile, on the balcony roof, Naruto had TenTen asleep in his lap. _She's so cute...Lee was right..._

Sai was on the roof opposite. He pulled out a dart blower, and loaded it with a dart. "Sorry about this, Naruto-san. But it's for the best." He began to blow, but he sucked instead, and swallowed the dart!

"Oh no! I've...I've...I've yawn Goodnight, Sai-chan. yawn" He collasped, and started to sleep. Poor Sai!

The blonde ninja thought someone was watching him. He looked round, and saw nothing. He started to eat the last caramel apple he had. It was really sticky, so his fingers didn't look good afterwards. Luckily, there was a pail of water nearby, so he washed his hands.

"Hmm...I've seen everyone so far except Sakura-chaaaaaaaannnn! Where's my favorite cherry blossam?" He said in a worried voice.

* * *

At the Hyuuga household, Hinata had changed her clothes. Roleplaying with Naruto had been fun, but she was worn out. She went to the fridge looking some junk food to snack on, but only found some smaller stuff. She took the apple juice carton, and started to drink out the carton.

"Excuse me, my daughter! But in this household, we use a glass to drink out of!" Demanded a important voice. Hinata spat out some juice, and wiped her mouth.

"Dad! I'm sorry, I thought you were out." Hinata said in a small voice. Hiashi gave his daughter a strict look.

"Where have you been for the past hour or so? You said you went to get ice cream with your teammates. And I know ice cream doesn't take THAT long to eat!"

Hinata turned her head slightly. "Well...you see...I bumped into Naruto, and well..."

"I can see why. You have a white rose in your hair." Hinata felt its petals, and blushed slightly.

Hiashi smiled. "Well, your a teenager. A 15-year old with her own dreams, goals, and activities. I was the same when I was your age. Me and my teammates always used to ''hang out'', as you young ones call it today." He opened the fridge and took out an plum.

"Well, I can't let you stay away from your loved one. Please, have fun, enjoy life to the fullest! Be proud as a Hyuuga!" He laughed as he walked back into the living room. "Teenagers these days...whatever next?"

Hinata giggled a little, and saw Hanabi in the doorway filing her nails. "Lucky, lucky, onee-chan. You almost got yelled at. I would have loved that Kodak moment of your terrified face!"

"Hanabi, don't be silly. And besides, why are you here?" Hinata asked

Hanabi smiled a little. "You wanted something right? Lemme get a milkshake." She blew her nails. _Perfect! _And chucked the file in the trash.

"Good idea! Give me one too!"

"With whipped cream, onee-chan?"

"You read my mind!" Hinata said cheerfully.

* * *

Shikamaru was still running for his life! "What a troublesome situation I'm in!"

"Get back here, you little punk!" One of the ninja screamed.

Chouji was walking with a bag of BBQ chips in his hand, and he saw Shikamaru. "What's he doing?" Shikamaru jumped down and rushed over to him.

"Chouji thank the lord! Look you gotta help me! I messed up some fruit stand, and now I gotta whole bunch of maniacs chasing me!" The genius was cowaring in fear. Chouji put on a serious look.

"It's alright, I'll handle this." Chouji stepped forward as the dozen or so ninja landed and walked over to him.

"Alright, alright, fatso. Move outta the way, you're blocking the street." One of them said.

The large ninja's ears twitched to the sound of a certain word. "WHAT...DID...YOU...SAY...?" He boomed

"F-A-T-S-O!" The man continued laughing.

Chouji exploded. "I am not fat! Bubun Baika No Jutsu!" Chouji's right arm was enlarged, and it slammed the ninja into the ground. He was panting.

Another one of them was shaking. "That symbol on his armor...and...that jutsu! He's...one of the Akimichi Clan!"

"Are you sure?"

"No doubt about it!"

"That's right you weaklings! I am Akimichi Chouji, and my dad is Akimichi Chouza!" Chouji said with a grin.

The ninja stammered. "Ch-ch-ch-ch-chouza? Oh god! Run for it men!" The shinobi turned tailed and ran back across town.

Shikamaru was surprised. "You know those guys?"

"Well, my dad does. It was a few years back, he and the leader of this gang got into a bar fight, and dad won fair and square!" Chouji said sniggering.

Shikamaru wiped his brow. "Phew! Thanks for saving my ass! You wanna go watch the clouds with me?"

"Of course, bestest best friend in the world! But first, I'll get some more chips!" Chouji exclaimed.

"OOookay...we'll do that. Just don't use that ''bestest'' term again. It's kinda embrassing..." Shikamaru said with hands behind his head.

* * *

Back on the east side, Sakura and the others were still on Lee Jr.

"We've looked everywhere Naruto would go." Sakura said with worry.

"He'll show up...hold on, I think I still got that..." Lee was getting something out his pocket. He pulled out a talkie.

"You have that?" Sakura asked

"I just remembered! Time to call him in!" He pressed a button. "This is Jet to Spike, come in Spike! Spike, come in!"

Naruto heard the talkie vibrate in his pocket. He answered. "This is Spike! What's up, Jet?"

"Spike, where are you? We've been looking for you everywhere!" Lee called

"Erm..." Naruto had no idea how to describe his location. He looked over the balcony, and saw the smashed watermelon stand. "I'm on a street with a smashed watermelon stand next to a market. That help ya, Jet?"

Lee got confused. "I know where that is!" Gai spoke out.

"You do, sensei?" Lee replied

Gai nodded. "It's the same place where my father had to bury Joey...it's sad for me everytime I walk through that street. Lee Jr., turn left!" The horse did a tight turn, and almost made everyone fall off.

"Spike, we'll be there shortly. And can we stop using codenames? Neji ruined the boombox with the ''Cowboy Bebop'' soundtrack!" Lee said frustrated.

"Okay, Lee. See ya." Naruto put the talkie away. _I wonder what they want anyway? Oh well, I'm recharged and ready to go! I wonder what TenTen wants to do next..._

**"I know what she wants to do, kit!" Boomed a deep, demonic voice**Naruto then found himself in front of the Kyuubi's cage.

"Damn fox! How long have you been awake?"

**"Since three and a half hours ago when you got that sugar rush! God, your so annoying, kit!"** Kyuubi said

Naruto raised an eyebrow. "So what I'm enjoying myself and-"

**"AND, you've kissed every girl you've seen today! First blondie (Ino), then little-miss-violet (Hinata), and now that Chinese tweety bird (TenTen) there! I've got an idea. Take that girl back to your apartment, and do the first thing that comes to your mind, or do I have to spell it out for you, dipshit?"**

The blonde figured out what he meant. "Kyuubi, you ero-demon! How could you think of that? I just like her that's all!" He said blushing slightly.

Kyuubi sniggered. **"Sure, sure, sure. Thats you humans all say, but soon, you're on the bed, 'making the beast with two backs'. I can see it now, a load of little you's with brown and blonde hair, and maybe a daughter with blonde hair! Now what sounds better? Uzumaki TenTen, Uzumaki Ino or Uzumaki Hinata? Or how about marrying all 3 and producing 3 children to each of them?**

"Kyuubi, shut the hell up! Geez, you give me a headache!"

**"Me? I've been stuck in here for 15 years, and I give you a headache? It's the other WAY AROUND! And what about Pinky? Why hasn't she shown up yet? God, I love that fine ass of hers...and she's a totally different species then me..." **The demon was sniggering at perverted thoughts.

Naruto slapped his hand on his forehead. "Damn, I never knew you demons were so persistant! I'm outta here!"

**"Good! I need to get back to my 18-hour-a-day sleep! Now get out!"**

Naruto found himself back in reality, TenTen was waking up. "Naruto-kun...you alright? Your staring into space."

"It's fine TenTen-chan." He sat down and gave her a hug. _Now what about the Bebop crew?_

"TenTen-chan, do you wanna be the next part of the Bebop crew? The next Faye?" Naruto asked giving his trademark grin.

TenTen's eyes lit up. "Of course, Naruto-kun! I want to have some fun! You and Lee were having all the fun." She kissed him on the cheek.

Sakura, Gai and Lee had reached the street. "There! The markets up ahead!" Sakura shouted. Gai, however, was sobbing and crying his eyes out.

"Joey...I'll never forget you...You were a noble steed right to the end!"

Lee Hyuten Jr. raced through the stalls, with Lee having to pardon themselves as they picked up speed. "There on the balcony ahead! I see Naruto!" Lee turned his head slightly and saw another figure on the opposite building. "And isn't that Sai? He looks like he's asleep..."

Sakura and Lee got off the horse. "Lee, you check on Sai. I got a certain little sugar-craving fox to catch." Sakura had a wolfy grin. She raced up the stairs to the balcony and saw quite an unusual sight...

"NARUTO!"

**To Be Continued...**

* * *

Aren't cliffhangers just the coolest thing around? The dramatic climax comes in **Chapter 5: **Sakura Help! Your Number One!

The name for the horse - In case you didn't figure it out, 'Lee' is the first name, 'Hyu' is from Hyuuga, and 'Ten' is from TenTen. The junior I added on to make it look funny.

'Making The Beast With Two Backs' - It's a quote in the Shakespeare play, Othello. And it's mentioned in the American Dad Ep "Stan Of Arabia. It means having sex.


	5. Sakura Help! You Are Number One!

**TheShamanMaster presents...**

**Naruto & Sugar Don't Mix**

_Story & Script by TheShamanMaster_

_Naruto © Masashi Kishimoto_

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Naruto...people should know that by now...

**Note: **This chapter is dedicated to everyone thats reviewed so far! Glad you enjoyed it!

_Previously..._

_Sakura and Lee got off the horse. "Lee, you check on Sai. I got a certain little sugar-craving fox to catch." Sakura had a wolfy grin. She raced up the stairs to the balcony and saw quite an unusual sight..._

_"NARUTO!"_

**

* * *

Chapter 5: Sakura Help! You Are Number One!**

The pink-haired kunoichi was lost beyond words. She saw Naruto had his arm around TenTen.

_**Inner Sakura: That bastard! He's really gonna get it now!**_

_But I have to continue the plan...I have to snap Naruto out of it..._ Naruto looked at Sakura.

"Sakura-chaaaaan! It's good to see you! I've missed you, where have you been all day!" He rushed over and gave her a hug also. Sakura blushed a little, but pushed Naruto back. She had to think of some way to get Naruto to chase her. She then spotted the bags of gummy bears in his pocket. _He still has some? Lucky me..._

Sakura smiled evily. "Naruto-kun, my little sweet-soon-to-be-hokage, why don't we play a game?"

Naruto smiled faintly. "What kind of a game, Sakura-chaaan?"

"Well, first things first. First, we gotta...OH MY GOD! IS THAT KAKASHI NAKED IN THE SHOWER?" She shouted pointing behind Naruto.

The blonde turned round. "What? I don't see anything, hey!" Sakura snatched the the remaining bags from him. "My candy!" He shouted

"Psyche! Catch me if you can, foxy-woxy!" The pink-haired girl jumped off the rooftop and started to run.

Naruto grinded his teeth. "Give that back, Sakura-chan!" He turned back to TenTen. "I'll see you later. I might not be back, but just remember what fun we've had okay?"

"Okay, Naruto-kun." They shared a passionate kiss, and Naruto jumped off the roof, and chased after Sakura.

Lee had found Sai sleeping. "Hm?" He picked up a long tube. "A dart blower? What was he doing with this?" He picked it up, pocketed it, and slung Sai over his shoulder.

"Hey TenTen! Help me with Sai would ya? He's out cold." Lee called out

TenTen raised an eyebrow. "From what?"

"I have no clue." Lee replied. TenTen helped Lee with Sai, and put him on the back of Gai's horse.

"Youthful comrades!" Gai stared at Sai. "What happened to him?"

"No clue, but I found a dart blower next to him. Let's take him to the hospital." declared Lee.

Gai nodded. "Right! We must help our fallen comrade! Lee Hyuten Jr.! Away!" The reins were shook, and the proud horse galloped onward.

TenTen was confused. "Gai-sensei, when did you get a horse?"

"It's a long story, but I'll tell you. Remember when I remember the Sweepstakes? I bought this horse!" Gai smiled and his teeth shone brightly.

"How come I didn't know?"

"You never asked."

The brunette sighed, and looked at the sky. It was a bit cloudy, but the sun was still out. She looked at her watch. 3:45pm.

* * *

Back at the Yamanaka Shop, Ino had finished flower arranging, and the bush, which Naruto had slightly ruined, had to be cut. She had the cut the remianing white roses off, and made a boque out of them. Ino sighed, looked at one of the roses, and smiled.

"Naruto, you idiot. You may act foolish, but you have such a big heart!" She felt the flowers petals, and placed it down. She then saw Shikamaru and Chouji walk past.

"Hey, Shikamaru, Chouji!" He called out. Shikamaru and Chouji walked towards her. "Hey Ino." Both replied back.

"How are you anyway? Shikamaru, you look a wreck, what happened?"

"Huh? Chouji you didn't tell me!" The lazy genius said looking embrassed. Chouji muttered a small 'Oops'.

Ino pulled a face. "Well, look at you! Your ponytails out, and your jacket looks tatty. What happened? Come in, I'll get you something to drink." All 3 walked back into the shop, and Ino got the boys some water.

"Well...call this troublesome...I fell into a fruit stand, and some guy got mad and almost killed me." Shikamaru said taking a sip of water.

"How'd that happen? You didn't tell me that in detail." Chouji said looking down. The lazy genius crossed his arms, and took a deep breath.

"Well, I bumped into Naruto earlier, and he was on sugar. So I went to get him some cola to shut him up and-"

"Hold up! You say Naruto was on sugar? No wonder he was acting so strange.." Ino said. _That explains why he was so happy and why he kissed me...He was hyperactive._

"Yeah, so anyway." Shikamaru continued. "I went to get him some cola, and when I got back he was kissing TenTen! He saw me, I tried to make a run for it, but he struck a kunai in my ankle, and I fell over the balcony and into the watermelons...Ino, are you okay?"

A dark aura appeared around the blonde girl's head. She squeezed the glass so hard, it broke, and the pieces fell to the ground. Shikamaru and Chouji quivered in fear in what she was going to do next.

"That...That...That PLAYBOY! Just wait to I get my hands on him! I'll rip him, I'll tear him, I'll...I'll..." She fell to the ground. "Oh, I can't do anything to him! He's just too hot to hurt! Too hot, too foolish, and way too sexy to hurt!" She whined.

"Hot? Sexy? Then what am I? Chopped liver?" Shikamaru said giving a weird look.

"I dunno, would you like to be food? Have you seen how good looking he is these days? Those muscles...Ohhh, I could just go to heaven in his arms and not even bothere to come back!" Ino was now smiling a really perverted smile.

"Hey, Shikamaru, if you are chopped liver, would you taste good on crackers?" Chouji asked twiddling his thumbs.

Shikamaru stuck his tongue out. "Yes! You can eat me with crackers, you oversized dolt!" He replied sarcasticly. He picked Ino up, and sat her down on a stool. "C'mon, Ino, snap out of it! This is Naruto we're talking about! You haven't fallen for him have you?"

"Don't you wish you had a body like his?" She said grinning.

Shikamaru blushed. "Ah, I need a bath, I'm covered in juice! You got a shower here, Ino?"

"Why? Who needs a shower? Why don't you ask me? Why don't we take off those clothes, and I'll see if you've got a body as good as Naruto's...if you know what I'm getting at.." She purred and kissed Shikamaru on the cheek.

"Ino, that's disgusting! We're not kids, ya know." He said blushing even more.

"But still, you'd look good..." Ino sniggered.

"Girl, you are troublesome indeed..." Shikamaru slapped his forehead.

* * *

Back in the streets, Naruto was still chasing Sakura. "C'mon Sakura-chan! Enough games please! Gimme my candy!"

"Not unless you catch me, foxy!" Sakura teased. Both picked up speed. _I need to slow him down somehow...aha! _She spotted a barrel of large shurikun, and quickly grabbed one. She focused the her chakra into the shurikun. She smiled evi

"Take this! Haruno Style, Kamaitachi1 Strike!" She threw the shurikun at Naruto, just missing his head.

"Okama2? I am not gay! Sasuke-teme was the okama around here!" He shouted as Sakura got ahead. He quickly raced after her.

In a hammock on the roof of the Hokage's office, Kakashi was reading Icha Icha Paradise, when he was interrupted by someone.

"Yo, Kakashi." Kakashi looked up to see Yamato.

"Hey, Yamato. What's up?"

"Strangest thing, I haven't seen Naruto or Sai all day and-"

"Naruto's gone hyper on sugar." Kakashi said cutting off Yamato.

"Hyper?" Yamato raised his eyebrow. "How'd you know?"

"Overheard it from Jiraiya." Kakashi turned a page. "I swear, that kid always gets into trouble."

"Alright, then what about Sai?"

"From what I heard, he was sent out to catch Naruto, but he ain't got back yet." The silver haired jounin laughed. "I bet those two are up to something..."

"Kakashi" Yamato said with a serious look. "Your flies undone."

Kakashi dropped his book and looked down. "No they ain't! Yamato, you tricked me!"

Yamato laughed. "Sorry, I just had to see your face!" He continued laughing, then stopped. "Wait, do you hear something?"

Kakashi listened. "Sounds like Sakura." Both him and Yamato saw two figures go by. Sakura, with Naruto chasing her.

"Get back here, Sakura-chan! I want my candy!"

"You can't catch me, little foxy! Aww, is little foxy getting tired from chasing his prey? Does he wanna take his nappy now?" Sakura called out teasing.

The blonde got more angry. "Sakura-chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!"

Kakashi and Yamato looked at one another, and chuckled. "Should we interfere?"

"Nope. Naruto'll probably get something out of this afterwards." Kakashi went back to his book.

* * *

Hinata went out looking for Shino and Kiba. She found Kiba who was lying in a small pool of blood. She shook him a little.

"Kiba-kun, wake up, Kiba-kun." The Inuzuka opened his eyes slightly.

"Are you an angel? You're beautiful."

Hinata blushed. "No not quite. It's me, Hinata."

Kiba sat up and shook his head. "What happened? How come I'm bleeding?"

"You had a perverted nosebleed and fainted. All because I came out wearing a Faye Valentine outfit."

Kiba shook his head again. "Yeah, that's right. C'mon, I'll make it up to you. How does nachos sound?"

Hinata hugged him. "Yay! My favorite! Where's Shino anyway?" Both turned to see Shino moonwalking.

"Yo, yo, yo! Wassup, biznitches? We all cool in da ghetto?" Shino said still dancing.

"Shino, knock it off. I'm gonna get nachos." Kiba stood up, and Hinata followed him.

"Yo, homie! Wait up! I've always got 'cho back, yo!"

* * *

Just then, the Kyuubi interrupted Naruto.

**"Hey kit! Seems Pinky turned up after all! Damn, her ass looks good in that overcoat!"**

"Fox, why now? Get the hell outta here!"

**"Oh come on, you idiot! Work it out! She's _obviously _wearing that overcoat to trick you! Remember, 'making the beast with-"**

"I get it, ero-demon! Now leave me alone!" Naruto shook his head.

**"Curse you! If I only I were a thousand years younger, and a human...Damn, I'd go for her!" **The Kyuubi went back to sleep. Naruto saw himself still chasing Sakura.

_I know how to make this easier..._He made a handseal. "Kage Bunshin No Jutsu!" 2 more Naruto's appeared, and began chasing also.

* * *

On the ground, Lee and the others had made it to the hospital. Lee carried Sai in. Luckly, Shizune was there.

"Oh lord, what happened here?" She said in shock.

"I think Sai took something. I found a dart blower next to him." He took it out, and showed it to Shizune.

"He must have swallowed a tranquilizer dart. He should be alright. Seems he's been out for an hour or so. Give around 2 hours, and the drug should wear off. For now, let's place him on a bed." The black-haired woman said.

Lee nodded. He followed her down a hall, found an empty room, and lyed Sai down. TenTen was with Lee, and they sat down next to the bed. Gai had to remain outside with the horse.

"So, TenTen, _why _were you with Naruto-kun anyhow?" He asked politely. TenTen blushed and wasn't sure how to answer.

"Well...I followed...we talked...and we made out..." She turned red, and started to put her fingers together, like Hinata would.

Lee's jaw dropped. "You kissed him? How youthful! So sweet also! TenTen, you definatly a woman of many talents! I praise you, like a goddess!" He fell to TenTens feet, and bowed.

"Lee, stop that, you're embrassing me." She said pushing him away. Lee nodded and sat back down.

"We'll stay here until Sai wakes up." The brunette nodded in agreement, closed her eyes, and had 40 winks.

* * *

Naruto's two clones gained speed, and were almost close to Sakura. She then spotted Naruto's apartment. _Bingo! The perfect trap!_

The blonde looked on. "My apartment? What is she thinking?" He mumbled to himself. The two clones dispersed. Sakura raced to the front door, forced it open, and ran inside. Naruto jumped down, and followed her inside.

"Sakura-chan! Come on out, you got nowhere else to run!" He heard the door slam, with Sakura behind.

"Fine, fine, little fox. You got me." She smiled sweetly.

"Now, my candy please." He said begging.

Sakura waved her finger. "Ah ah ah. That's not how the game works. You give me what I want, and you get want you want." She sat down on the couch.

Naruto let out a heavy sigh. "Fine, whatcha want?"

"Come here, and I'll tell you..." She said in a sexy way. The blonde walked over to her, and Sakura grabbed him, and pulled him inwards for a kiss.

"God, you're so hot!" Sakura kissed him harder. "You taste so sweet..." Naruto blushed and melted into Sakura's kiss. He layed on top of Sakura, and started to kiss her jawline, then followed it down to her neck which made her moan.

"Now." Sakura whispered in his ear. "Now, you love me don't you?"

"I do, Sakura-chan."

"Good, Naruto-kun. That's what I want to hear. Now, tell me what you want. Really."

Naruto breathed heavily. "I...want...you!" Sakura smiled.

"I'd knew you'd say that." She got up, and started to unzip the overcoat she had on, and it dropped to the floor. The kyuubi kid's eyes widened at the sight in front of him.

"Sakura-chan, you're SO DAMN SEXY!" He got a huge nosebleed (probably his biggest ever), fell backwards, and hit his head on the coffee table, which broke under him.

"Owie..." He fainted. Sakura giggled. She picked him up, and placed him back on the couch. She touched the ear piece which she had on.

"Tsunade-sama, Operation: RECAPTURE, is complete. He's out cold." She announced.

"Good work, Sakura! Now, can you stay with him until he wakes up?" Tsunade replied back.

"It will be my pleasure."

_1 and 1/2 hours later..._

Naruto weakly opened his eyes, and noticed he had a huge headache. He felt the ice pack on his head. He looked around, and noticed he was in his apartment.

_What happened? Last thing I remember...I kissed Sakura-chan...or was that a dream? _He noticed a bit of dry blood on his nose. _Oh god! That was no dream!_

"Oh, Naruto-kun, you're awake. How you feeling?" Naruto looked up to see Sakura in a pink bikini.

"Sa...Sakura-chan? What happened? Why you wearing that? I mean, you are beautiful, but..." She blushed crimson.

"Well, you had a sugar rush. Don't you remember? Bebop Crew? Kissing Ino? The white roses?" Naruto shook his head.

"Some of it yeah." He noticed his clothes. "Excuse me while I change." He got to the bathroom, had a shower, and changed back into his regular orange and black outfit. A few minutes later, he sat down again with Sakura.

"Sorry about today, I've been meaning to ask you something all day."

Sakura placed her hand on Naruto's. "What is it?"

"May I have the pleasure of eating dinner with you this evening, Sakura-chan?" He said softly.

"Like a date?"

Naruto nodded. Sakura pondered for a minute. Then, her face lit up.

"Yes, Naruto-kun! Yes!" Both of them hugged one another, and shared a passionate kiss.

"I love you, Sakura-chan." Naruto said stroking the soft, pink bangs of hair on her face.

"I love you too, Naruto-kun."

**END

* * *

**

Whatcha think? Good or bad ending? I'm gonna add an Epilogue to reveal what happened to Sai and the others. Hope you enjoyed! This is TheShamanMaster, signing off! 


	6. Epilogue

**TheShamanMaster presents...**

**Naruto & Sugar Don't Mix**

_Story & Script by TheShamanMaster_

_Naruto © Masashi Kishimoto_

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Naruto...people should know that by now...

**Epilogue Chapter**

_Sai, Lee and Gai_

Sai had woken up. Apparently, he had remembered swallowing the dart, and felt pretty dumb about it. Because Lee felt sorry for him, He and Gai let Sai ride Lee Hyuten. Jr. And Sai had the time of his life. According to Gai, Sai had rode Lee Jr.: "proud, and amazing, like his father and Joey used to."

_Kakashi and Yamato_

They heard about the mission, and had told the rest of the Jounin sensei's! They laughed, and laughed about it for ages. Apparently, Jiraiya was disappointed. No babe for his novels! He sighed, and said: "Well, there's always the hot springs." In the end, it turned out that "Mother Hen" was actually Kakashi. He had told Yamato.

_Hinata, Shino, and Kiba._

All 3 had spent the evening together. Shino was still acting gangster-style, but Kiba found it quite amusing, by making fake threats about shooting one another, and having brawls. Hinata enjoyed herself also. So, in the end, Team 8 were having the best time of their lives. And the end of the evening, Kiba and Hinata shared a kiss, and tried to forget about it.

_Ino-Shika-Cho_

Shikamaru, that evening, had managed to get cleaned up, and pay the money for the damages. Then, all 3 enjoyed a barbecue. Chouji the most. Ino and Shikamaru got awfully close to one another, but Chouji didn't mind.

_Neji and TenTen_

Turned out Neji had lost Naruto, and found TenTen later on. He begged and pleaded for forgiveness, and admitted he loved her. TenTen finally accepted his apology, and they went out for Chinese.

_and Naruto and Sakura?_

The two teammates spent the evening together. Naruto took Sakura to an Italian Restaurant, which surprised Sakura quite a bit. They had a nice dinner of spaghetti and meatballs, and afterwards took a nice walk in the moonlight. Finally, they got back to Sakura's house, and slept with one another. They didn't have sex though. As Naruto slept, he was over the hill. He had the most beautiful girl in the world with him. Haruno Sakura. The only girl he would ever love.

**END

* * *

Finally, it's done! Please do review, I'll be glad if you do! Hope you enjoyed this fic.**

Should I do a sequel?


End file.
